This Just In: Some People are Bilingual

UFC 71. Karo Parisyan vs. Josh Burkman:

Joe Rogan: "Karo's receiving instructions in two different languages."

Mike Goldberg: "And he understands them both."

Weirdo vs. Hippie

Ultimate Fight Night 11. Luke Cummo vs. Edilberto Crocota:

On Crocota: "That's a weird dude."

On Luke: "...and then you talk about the crazy hippie, Luke Cummo."

Get The F Out

UFC 79. Chuck throws a kick at Wanderlei:

"Attacking with the teet, Chuck Liddell..."

The Other Left

UFC 79. Machida vs. Sokoudjou:

Mike Goldberg: "...catches a right jab..."
Joe Rogan: "That was a straight left."
Mike Goldberg: "Yeah it was. Pardon me."

Goldie's Consonant Exchange Program

UFC 60: Spencer Fisher vs. Matt Wiman:

"Spencer Fisher has finally achieved a level where he can focus full-time on fighting. A late change means he faces Watt Miman."

A Star is Born

We Likes to Party

This might be the first time I've ever seen Mike Goldberg not dressed like he's working the door at a less-that-reputable gentleman's establishment.

I came across this Gold nugget over at Kenny Florian's MySpace. I interviewed Florian (read it here) and asked him about our hero. Apparently, they're tight:

Me: I’ve seen a few pictures of you hanging with UFC broadcaster Mike Goldberg. Is Goldie a party guy???

Kenny Florian: Goldie is a great guy. Fun to hang out with. People don’t realize how funny this guy is.

Oh, we realize, Kenny. We realize...

I Like Your Style, Dude

UFC 75. Houston Alexander destroyed Alessio Sakara. Mike Goldberg was impressed:

"That...dude... is VIOLENT!"

Goldie said dude...

Big Nog Gets the Nod

UFC 81. Joe Rogan sang the praises of Rodrigo Nogueira, and Mike Goldberg felt the need to say something:

"No doubt about it. He's got plenty of...decorated awards in his trophy case."

Discourse on The Pitbull

Today, February 4, is Andrei Arlovski's 29th birthday, so in honor of one of my favorite fighters of all time (yes, I'm serious), here's a Gold nugget from Arlovski's UFC 47 fight with Cabbage Correira:

"There's no doubt about it, Joe. He's warriory."

Glorious...

...'til the White Meat Shows

From UFC 77:

"If the doctor says he can see your skull, THAT'S FREAKY, man!"

(picture from FiveOuncesofPain.com)

Seeing Stars

Another gem from UFC 79:

"David Spade...among the MEGA-celebrities who've come out for the UFC!"

David Spade is a little lesbian and should not be on camera.

(photo from grasscrown.com)

Defines?

Joe Rogan was talking about Wanderlei Silva back at UFC 79, and Mike Goldberg felt the need to say something:

"He defines...CAGEFIGHTER!"

Wanderlei is now 0-3 in the UFC cage and spent the majority of his professional career fighting in the ring. But that's OK...

Goldie Has Seen A Lot of BJ's

June 23, 2007: BJ Penn vs. Jens Pulver:

"That's the best looking BJ we've seen in a long time!"

I almost ruined my shorts...

Welcome to Mike Goldberg Is the Greatest

The title pretty much says it all. Mike Goldberg, a.k.a. Goldie, a.k.a. The Gold Standard, is the single greatest UFC play-by-play guy this side of Joe Rogan (and other guest commentators).

Other than the action that takes place inside the Octagon, Goldie's discourse is far and away my favorite part of UFC broadcasts. He's moderately informed, inordinately excitable, and still learning the finer points of the English language. He shouts. He close-talks. He nods unwittingly. He has a blast.

By way of this blog, I endeavor to share with you all the unmitigated joy that Goldie's deep analysis and peerless insight bring to me and millions of others. If you see that I haven't included one of your favorite Mike Goldberg moments, please share. Please.

Let the madness begin...